The Annoying thing with A hatchet meets Vincent
by Mystic Loser
Summary: PG-13 for language and insane-ness.. What if some little psychopath reaches Vincent before Cloud?


The Annoying Thing With a Hatchet meets Vincent  
  
(aka, A Vampires Migrane.)  
  
By Mystic Loser  
  
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She was about four foot tall with pasty grey skin and large timberwolf eyes with no visble pupil. Half of the large round eyes were covered by bangs, and she was dressed in baggy grey and black clothes. As a wepon she carried around a simple hatchet. Of course most could not tell if she was a male a female or simply just some akward mako-accident running around the world. She came to Neibielhiem about a month before Cloud and the gang did. She was stopping by because she had run out of pixie sticks, and was tierd pissing behind trees. God dammit! She wanted a toilet and she wanted it now!!  
  
So she came into the town and caused quite a flurry. The Shira workers dressed as townfolk didn't like this girl much. Oh no, not much indeed. She latched on quickly to the inn keeper. When asked her name she simply replied, "GOD DAMMIT AJAX! I TOLD YOU NO CHEWING ON THE MAILMANS MOMMY- DADDY MACHINE!" and kicked him square in the balls. Oh no, this wasn't good at all. They couldn't get rid of her either. She spent three days wooing up the town, riding through the small circle blowing a horn at ungodly hours of the night, stopping only to sing "Im too sexy for my shirt" in the loudest, off-keyist voice you could imagine.  
  
Something had to be done..  
  
"OOOOOH BOY THAT HOUSE IS CREEPY!" The Annoying Thing with A Hatchet said.  
  
"Yes, but theres lots of candy inside.." one of the workers said.  
  
"I'VE GOT A LOVLEY ASS!" T.A.T.W.A.H. said, running towards the gate. She lept over with two single bounds. One bound to ontop of an innocent bystanders head, the next bound over the fence itself.  
  
When she was inside everyone began to cheer, then blocked the door so she couldn't get out.  
  
"IM JUST GEEY-ATING STARTED!" she screeched, running from room to room, destroying any chair, monster or secret supper safe insight.  
  
She was chopping away at a wall with a bunch of lights and numbers on it until a key popped out, and a glob of what looked like jelly. "I LOVE YOU!" T.A.T.W.A.H shouted at the jelly before shoving it down her throat. "Wiggles all the way down." Then she picked up the key and skipped over to a wall, leaning against it she tried to caught the light from the window on the key to make it shiny. The wall opened up and T.A.T.W.A.H. fell down a flight of stairs. She stood up and brushed herself off, then walked up to the next door, unlocking it with the key. Coffins and skulls and a bunch of nasty rotting stuff littered the corridor, but T.A.T.W.A.H. didn't seem to notice, or care. She began to run wildly down the hall kicking skulls while she sung, "The sun will come out tommorow."  
  
Suddenly she ran into a coffin on a stone table, knocking it over. A man tumbled out of it.  
  
"HOLY DANCING DINGOS BATMAN!!!" T.A.T.W.A.H. yelled, "Its the dead thing." Suddenly the man sat up, brushing black hair from his eyes.  
  
"Who are you..?" he asked, looking at her.  
  
"My mommy said she doesn't know, and doesn't wanna know!" she replied.  
  
"Leave me alone." the man said, setting his coffin up.  
  
"Who are you?" she asked.  
  
"Vincent, Vincent Valentine."  
  
"OOOHH...lets play hide and go seek." T.A.T.W.A.H. said as Vincent slid the lid over his coffin. She began to count to a thousand. Sadly she didn't know how to count so she stood there and spoke jibberish for three days.  
  
After she finished counting she ran over and pushed the coffin off the table and Vincent fell out again. Then she began to kick him. In the balls. Vincent grabbed himself to keep her from kicking him and cursed. Pulling himself up he glared at her, his hollow red eyes full of homicidal intentions.  
  
"LETS PLAY HOUSE!" T.A.T.W.A.H. yelled.  
  
Vincent's eyes grew wide with fear. What horrors lied in wait for him....?  
  
-Aboot a month later-  
  
"This is odd, this town was destroied!" Cloud said.  
  
"If I were you I'd just leave.. Run RUN AND NEVER COME BACK! DEMONS HAUNT THIS PLACE!" A Worker screamed running away in fear. Suddenly along wail of pain and fear came from the spooky mansion on the hill. AVALANCHE exchanged glances and ran.  
  
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END!  
  
-A.N. Well, thats all. Booty-ful, right? If there are any request I'll continue with the adventures of T.A.T.W.A.H. and Vincent.  
  
Oh yeah, I don't own nothing! 


End file.
